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# Survival Has Consequences
- URL: https://fessup.mymidnight.blog/survival-has-consequences/
- Published: 2026-04-16T19:48:43.000Z
- Updated: 2026-10-07T16:11:39.000Z
- Description: I Didn’t Fail at Brushing My Teeth. I Was Surviving.
- Author: Jerry Fess
- Tags: self care, dentures, surviving, dentist, health, teeth, self-care, dental, depression, mental health, honesty, Newsletter, #Migrated-1791389245739, #Import 2026-10-07 11:10

I kept pretending this wouldn’t happen to me.

Or that if it did, it could be fixed later. Somewhere down the road. Some future version of me would have more money, more stability, better habits, better insurance, better everything.

But now is later.

Now is the future I kept postponing, and reality is hitting me head-on.

![](https://cdn.mymidnight.blog/faafda66202d234463057972460c04f5/2026/10/6ca57a5f-4c5f-4670-a144-971c42de850e_1024x1536.png)

I still have almost all of my upper teeth except one. On the bottom, I have four front teeth and two back molars. That’s it. My dentist told me I need to start looking into dentures because the path I’m on isn’t sustainable anymore. There’s not enough balance in my bite for her to feel comfortable continuing patchwork fixes.

I can’t really chew. Not normally. I can partially chew on one side of my mouth, and that’s become normal enough that I stopped noticing how abnormal it is.

It’s embarrassing to say out loud.

But it’s reality.

And it’s a reality I can’t ignore anymore. If anything, I may have ignored it too long.

How did I get here? Years of depression. Decades of dry mouth from medication. Long stretches where basic self-care felt impossible. Times in life when surviving took every ounce of energy I had, and things like brushing, flossing, checkups, and long-term consequences fell to the bottom of the list.

Medication helped me in some ways. I’m not denying that. I’m also not pretending medication is perfect. There are drugs prescribed for mental health and even medications used to help people recover from addiction that can directly contribute to dental decay, dry mouth, grinding, erosion, or long-term damage.

![](https://cdn.mymidnight.blog/faafda66202d234463057972460c04f5/2026/10/e042ccca-68ab-434b-ba48-545df1fa668a_1536x2048-jpeg.jpg)

That doesn’t erase personal responsibility. I’m not trying to dodge mine.

I’m saying reality is more complicated than people like to admit.

Sometimes treatment comes with costs. Sometimes surviving one problem creates another. Sometimes the thing helping keep you alive also leaves damage behind.

People love to treat bad teeth like a moral failure.

Like damaged teeth mean laziness. Grossness. Carelessness.

Sometimes damaged teeth mean depression. Poverty. Medication side effects. Trauma. Exhaustion. Lack of access. Shame spiraling into avoidance.

Sometimes it means someone was trying to stay alive.

Losing teeth isn’t the only consequence of surviving.

Sometimes it’s insomnia.  
Sometimes it’s panic in peaceful moments.  
Sometimes it’s a body that never learned how to unclench.  
Sometimes it’s debt from emergencies that never stopped coming.  
Sometimes it’s years without photos because you hated your smile.

And now I’m being told I need dentures — but I can’t afford dentures. Not regular dentures. Not even “affordable” dentures. Insurance doesn’t cover what I need.

That’s the punchline, isn’t it?

In America, teeth are treated like luxury bones. Vision gets the same treatment. We separate mouths and eyes from the rest of the body and act surprised when people suffer.

You can lose the ability to chew and still be told it’s optional care.

You can live in pain and still be handed a bill you can’t pay.

So yeah, I’m embarrassed.

But I’m also angry.

Because this isn’t just my failure. It’s also a system built to let problems become disasters before help becomes possible.

I don’t know what I’m going to do yet.

I just know pretending is over.

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